The Culprits

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Gideon's Birthday Adventures & Mommy Drain Bamage

Yesterday was Gideon's (boy #4) birthday. The first part of the day, all the boys were playing legos together at the dining room table. Seth is 14. This doesn't happen very often any more, so I had to capture the moment. I love when they all play together; it warms my mama-heart.


But the fun had to end because I knew I would have to take THIS boy to the doctor. Titus too. Both had a pink-eye-thing, if you couldn't tell.
                               We had lunch first. Jarod made Gideon a special birthday sandwich.
Micah made Gideon a birthday crown & dubbed him King for the Day, which has become our birthday tradition over the past few years.
 I made about 1200 phone calls to doctors offices & our insurance company. Our family doctor couldn't see Isaac, so I had to get a visit to the walk-in pre-authorized. Which kind of defeats the purpose of the "walk-in" (which is supposed to be convenient), doesn't it? Annoying. But at least the walk-in had a neato fish tank which kept the boys entertained for a few minutes.
       Who knew the walk-in was also our little town's aquarium? It was an errand and a field trip. 

                                              Titus is always a very cooperative patient.
 Isaac has a serious doctor phobia & starts screaming if a doctor even looks in his general direction. However, this visit.......I told him to " kindly please stop crying".......and he DID. It was......weird. Guess he's turning into a big boy. He wasn't exactly sure about the finger thingie, but he didn't fight it. Having all his brothers around him was comforting.

Seth helped Isaac (and subsequently me) to endure the wait.
                                                  Bored boys. We had a pretty long wait. It was a small office. And there were a lot of energetic boys with me. Not exactly their idea of a good time.
 After the we left the doctor's office, we went to WalMart for eye medicine, cake-makin' stuff & birthday presents. I literally had to go through the pharmacy line 4 times, at approximately 10 min each wait. Stupid stuff with the insurance company: authorization issues or something. More annoying. GGgrrrrrr. But I knew I was out of time to start any cake. So I opted for doughnuts, which actually made the boys really happy. When I was in the check-out line, the lady tried to charge me for 12 dozen doughnuts instead of just 12 doughnuts. Then she tried to fix it & got stuck. The "speedy" checkout line took about 15 minutes. But the boys were amazingly well-behaved through all the lines we stood in & waiting that we did during the day. At least, I think they were good. I know at some point I stopped being able to think about anything except for getting home & was probably mentally tuning some things out. It's this great ability I ignore some of the really annoying things the boys can do. It's a super power, really. But I think it has damaged my brain & caused memory loss issues. I go into the "zone" & I say 'yes' to things I have no recollection of saying 'yes' to. I don't often hear them before about the 4th or 5th "MOOOOMMYYYY!!!" It's not good. But, it does help me to stay somewhat sane. I'm pretty sure I took candy bars & gum-packs out of their grubby little hands, lifted a couple of them off of the conveyor belt & stopped a fist fight or two in the grocery line. I just have no memory of it. I'm probably better off that way. So are the children.
Somehow, Gideon didn't notice that the day was stressful.........he was just so happy it was his birthday. When Daddy got home we had our little family party for him. (We'll have a BIG family birthday with my in-laws in a couple weeks.) 
                          Seth helping Gideon put his lego ship together. He's a nice big brother.

 I can't believe my baby is 6 years old already. He brings such joy, happiness & humour into our lives. I can't imagine my life without him. I'm really glad he doesn't think that he is too old for my hugs & kisses. His brothers are always trying to tell him it's not "manly" to smooch me, so he gives me EXTRA smooches, just to spite them. When we were getting ready for the trip to the doctor, we had THIS conversation: 
                         Me: "Gideon put these jeans on." 
                       Gideon: "Awwwww!!! I wanted to wear my sweats!!!"
                        Me: "It's your birthday. You need to be handsome." 
                       Gideon (remembering):    "Oooohhhhhhh,YYEEAAAHH!!! Hey, Mom. Can I wear a tie?"
                        Me: "Not THAT handsome." 
                       Gideon (throwing his arms around my neck):"You're the best mommy in the world."
                        Me: "You're the best Gideon in the world." Followed by lots of smooches to my cheeks. Why? I don't know. Because he loves me. Of course, he also uses this method to get out of trouble. It sometimes works. He's cheesy & melodramatic & oh-so-silly & sweet. He makes me happy.

Isaac's (& Titus') eyes were greatly improved by the end of the evening...........probably didn't even need to go to the doctor. Oh, well. At least we have enough drops for the next bought of pink eye. I should add that I am thankful for health care & for my ability to take care of my childrens' needs. I am thankful for convenient-type stores & for my neat IPhone (even though I hate talking on it to the insurance company & it takes bad pictures) & for a car to drive to the store & to the doctor in. But that doesn't mean I'm not brain damaged.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

AAaaaallllllllllll of the Ballerinas, Horsies, Doggies & Lock-Clicker-Thingies

 Mr. Mike put the boys to work at the horsie ranch yesterday. Didn't clean any poo this time. Just swept up the barn a bit, then got to groom a horse & take some lassoing lessons.

 Isaac hiding from all the attention the ladies were giving him. He's so freakin' cute, he should just get used to that. I have news for ya, little buddy. They can still see you, even though your eyes are closed. 

                                      Seth giving a horsie friend some TLC.

Jarod's lessons went great!
    Lassoed himself a right nice cowpoke.

                                                             Micah's turn.

                                            One of our pretty horsie friends.

                                                               Snack time!

                                        Nice doggie friend, shakin' hands.

When we were done at the ranch, we went home, got un-muddy & left for Cousin Abigail's ballet recital. Abi's little number with her ballet friends was the very first one in the show. She ran around delicately in her little tu-tu with her little friends. She was the cutest one there of course. We were pretty much sitting in the very back of the huge auditorium & it was a little bit difficult to see who was who up on that stage. However, it was easy to keep track of her up there, as she was the only little girl with her tu-tu sticking up in the back & little leotard-covered tushy showing. It was about the cutest thing I've seen in a long time (the dancing AND the tushy). Her number was proximately 2 minutes long. Then it was over.....with the rest of the recital to watch. I personally enjoyed the show. But I had several complaints, from some boys I know, that they were getting ready to DIE. That went on for about 2 hours. By the time the show was over, my phone battery was dead from letting Isaac & Titus watch Veggie Tales on my IPhone (I love my IPhone). My tic-tacs & pack of gum were decimated & I tried to keep at least their taste buds entertained. I then resorted to utilizing my breath spray. You'd be surprised how entertaining breath spray can be. And the little kids weren't even the biggest difficulty! Seth, the large teenage man-child, went from texting to whining to squirming to sighing to shooting himself in the head with his fingers & back to texting. Thank goodness he spotted a friend from church to hang out with for a few minutes. I do need to mention: Gideon was an angel & loved the show. He sat next to Grandma, just mesmerized. I think he appreciates the arts. Or the pretty girls. Not sure which.

When the show was over, we went out (waaaaayyyyyy out) to the car to leave. We were going to go celebrate Abi's performance at McDonald's with some ice cream. I then realized my little lock-clicker-thingie was no longer on my key chain. My ignition key doesn't open my car door. We were locked out. Had to take aaaaaaalllllllllll the boys aaaaaalllll the way back to retrace our steps & look under our seats. No clicker thingie. Had to call my Hero (on Seth's phone, cuz mine was dead) to come rescue me. Walked aaaaaaallllll the way back to the car. Grandma took the boys in her van to McDonald's to wait for me. Shortly after, my Knight-in-Shining-Armour (who was already half-way home from work, after a long hard day, had to turn around & come back aaaaaallllllll the way he had come from) rescued me & we finally met up with everyone. I did find my lock-clicker-thingie lying on the ground in the driveway when I got home.

 Abi showin' off her moves: cutest ballerina EVER.
                  Gideon was a VERY PROUD cousin!!!!

I'm getting a little tired of my spell check telling me that "thingie" & "horsie" & "doggie" & "aaaaaallllllll" are not real words. I'm just saying.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Goodbye, Gloria

I dropped my sister off at the bus stop tonight, after her extended holiday/school break/visit with us. I didn't WANT to drop her off. I wanted to keep her. We have not spent any real time together in the past several years, so her visit was such a blessing. We had emotional discussions about our childhood, about life, about God, about our fears, pains, & joys. We didn't have even one argument or fight the entire month (as we have been known to do in years past). We laughed. We cried. She bonded with the boys & they with her. She changed poopy diapers, folded laundry, read stories to the boys & played games with them. She has such a quiet, patient, gentle way with them & they all adore her. We all got used to her being around. Now we miss her. A lot. Especially me. I have to change all the poopy diapers again. And be without my sweet sister & dear friend. I'm sad.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Heather At Dawn

My Day:

1. Got up early & took Seth to take his finals.
2. Cried a little & prayed for Seth to do well on his tests because I'm a stressed out, neurotic mess who fears waking up one day & realizing I have ruined his life by my decision to homeschool......and by all the other stuff I do & don't do that I should & should not do. 
3. Got some alone-ME-time to go shopping.
4. Thrift store was closed.
5. Thankfully the dollar store was just opening.
6. Went to Wendy's for some low-carb/healthy chicken nuggets.
7. Wendy's was closed.
8. Wondered if I was in the Twilight Zone.
9. Blinked.
10. Had a realization that, in the OUTSIDE world, a lot of places of business are actually closed sometimes.
11. Went to Paul's Market for cheese & nuts instead.
12. Went back to the thrift store in time for Seth to call me to pick him up.
13. Seth thinks he did GREAT on his tests.
14. I might not have ruined his life.
15. We'll see.
16. May open a savings account for his future counseling needs. If the bank is open.
17. Am VERY proud of the large man-child in the below pic.

Cream & Slobber, Anyone?

When my back is turned, bad things happen.
So I grab my camera.
                                                  As any good mom would do.
                        Some of you might think this is gross.
Slobber and coffee creamer would have sounded gross to me as well, once. 6 kids later, I just see a photo-shoot opportunity.

I teach my children to share.
                                            "Don't sit on the table, Titus!!!
                                                   That's bad manners."
                                             Less for Mommy to clean now. Good job, boys.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Car Conversations

On the way home from church a couple weeks ago:

Me: "What did you learn in class today, boys?"

Micah: "That Jesus was perfect & never sinned."

Jarod: "Mom?"

Me: "What?"

Jarod: "Did Jesus ever fart?"

Me: "Yes. (Sigh.) Jesus farted. But he probably said excuse me."

On the way home from church today:

Jarod, ripping his coat off in the back seat to avoid death from heat-stroke: "Mom, turn off the heater!!!! I'm sweating like a pig."

Seth, rolling his eyes at his brother's pathetic, inexcusable ignorance: "Pigs are NOT ABLE to sweat, Jarod."

Me, realizing something profound: "Oh!!! That must be why they roll around in the mud! To stay cool!"

Auntie Gloria, being the smart lady she is: "Horses can't vomit. They don't have the same gag reflex that humans do. If they eat too much they can die."

Me, taking note of the obvious parallel: "Hmmmm. Weird. Hey! Justin can't whistle."

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Chomping at the Bit

                                                                 This past fall (& early winter), I started taking the boys to this neato horse ranch. Mr.Mike adopts horses who need homes & has the youth help him care for them. He teaches kids how to groom the horses & clean out horsie-stalls & also gives riding lessons. He teaches a strong joy-in-work ethic. Due to illness, I have not been able to take the boys there for a couple months. But they love going & are chomping at the bit to go back to see Mr.Mike & his beautiful horses. Jarod & Seth especially seem to have a way with the horses & love interacting with them. 


                   Watching big brothers ride & waiting for their turns.
                                           Mr.Mike giving Jarod riding lessons.
                                                           Seth on his own!!!!!

                                                           Hard-workin' boys!!!

         OCD-boy: "Why am I standing in poop?"

                                                   Yes, Titus. Your shoe is DIRTY.
        One of my bestist best friends ever......and the one who introduced us to Mr.Mike & his horsies.
                                             A famous Mr.Mike group hug.